Note of today: 2019-04-17

Why am I teasing myself? I look at ads and open each link just to see photo and… for what else? I’ll never buy one for myself, it’s pathetic. But to show what I want. Why? I’m pathetic. I do act pathetically. How can I be string and independent?
Meanwhile I’m not looking forward for tomorrow.


Note of today: 2019-04-15

It was hard today. I did want to run away from this, but I couldn’t. Usually I just turn around and fo, to not face the truth and hardship of the moment. But today I couldn’t, I had to face it, even that I tried.

The other thing that was borhering me for more time is still here. But I didn’t feed the beast todsy, rather I was busy with the first thing.

Note of today: 2019-04-14


I had the same battle in my head this morning. This time one of the worst case scenarios painted my morning sleep with almost tears. So close to cry just from my thoughts. Well played, head, well played.

Working in a garden helped to clean my brain. The body is tired, the garden is clean. There are places for improvements, but one at a time.

I guess tonight my head will be filled with morning thoughts yet again. When will I solve it?